There comes a time in every military wife's life that she has a mental breakdown (or two). It is usually when her husband is deployed or gone for a longer period of time. It can also happens when the Air Force ruins any plans for the umpteenth time in a row. It can occur after a week or a month. It can be a small breakdown or a large one. I am long overdue for my mental breakdown!
I was almost at my max stress level prior to my trip to Disney (I will write a happier blog about my trip tomorrow). I had a thousand things going on at once and NO TIME to do any of it. Nothing was going my way. Then I had a few days away at the "Happiest Place on Earth" and forgot all about my stress.
Now here I am, back home and my list of 1,258 things to do is still sitting here waiting for me. That's not an exaggeration at all, I counted! And so today is my day for my mental breakdown.
Here is my short version: Everything and everyone is irritating me today. Lots of feeling of hurt and disappointment towards some people in my life have resurfaced. I have a strong sense of emptiness, I want my Mom. I want my husband home. I hate the Air Force (only military wives are allowed to make this statement.) I tried to upgrade my phone but of course they are all out of the iPhone today. And the frosting on the cake, I locked myself out of the house.
I was already crying on my way home from Verizon, partly because I needed the iPhone to make my day better but mostly because my stress level has far surpassed my max. I came home to realize that my husband did not have a set of house keys on his key ring (I drove his truck), which means I could not get into our house. I barely had any battery left on my phone because I thought I was coming home with a new phone so any phone call I made needed to be quick and to the point.
Seriously?! Can anything go my way today?
Cue mental breakdown...
I am ready for something good (anything good). If you have any good news PLEASE call me! I need some positive energy sent my way.
For now, you can find me cuddled on my couch with ice cream and Cheyenne praying for the strength to make tomorrow a better day.
Hugs! I know exactly where you are at. I did the exact same thing when Jim was deployed last year and cried for an hour. It was horrible. Let me know if I can do anything at all. Maybe we could catch "The Vow" this weekend on Sunday?? Let me know.
ReplyDeleteThanks Courtney! I may be headed out of town on Saturday but if I don't, I'd love to go see "The Vow" with you :)
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